100+ Funny Dating Quotes for Him That Will Make Him Smile

Get Ready to Laugh: Humerous Dating Quotes for Him

Finding the right words to express your feelings while keeping it light and humorous can be tricky. Whether you’re in a long-term relationship or just started dating, humor is a great way to keep things fun and connected. If you’re looking for a way to make him laugh, these funny dating quotes for him will do the trick! From cheeky one-liners to playful quotes from celebrities, this collection is perfect for those moments when a good laugh is just what your relationship needs.

Each quote in this list has been carefully selected to add a little sparkle of humor to your love life. Whether it’s a witty observation from a famous comedian or a quirky line from an everyday romantic, you’ll find something here that resonates with your relationship.

Save this list for when you need a quick smile or the perfect playful message to share with your boyfriend, husband, or crush. Laughter truly is the best way to his heart!

Famous Funny Dating Quotes for Him

Celebrities, actors, and public figures often have a humorous take on love and relationships. They know how to find the comedy in dating and turn it into something relatable and funny. In this section, you’ll find witty and playful quotes from well-known stars like Will Smith, Ellen DeGeneres, and George Clooney. These personalities use humor to deal with the ups and downs of romance, making these quotes perfect for sharing with your boyfriend, husband, or crush. Whether it’s a clever one-liner or a laugh-out-loud observation, these quotes are sure to lighten the mood and add some fun to your relationship.

1. “Love is like a backache—it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” – Bill Murray
2. “Being married means I can break wind and eat ice cream in bed.” – Brad Pitt
3. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.” – Will Ferrell
4. “Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” – Albert Einstein
5. “My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.” – Rodney Dangerfield
6. “I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.” – Russell Brand
7. “What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.” – Cindy Gardner
8. “Husbands are like wine; they take a long time to mature.” – Donatella Versace
9. “Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park.” – Unknown
10. “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner
11. “Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support and a little bit of freedom.” – Jerry Seinfeld

Comedians’ Funny Dating Quotes

When it comes to love and relationships, comedians have a way of turning even the most awkward or difficult moments into hilarious anecdotes. In this section, we highlight quotes from some of the most famous comedians, including Jerry Seinfeld, Ellen DeGeneres, and Kevin Hart. Their witty, sarcastic, and sometimes brutally honest observations about dating are bound to make you laugh out loud. Whether you’re in a new relationship or have been with your partner for years, these funny dating quotes will remind you that love and laughter truly go hand in hand.

12. “Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need ten years before you can even call yourself a beginner.” – Jerry Seinfeld
13. “I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.” – Rodney Dangerfield
14. “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner
15. “Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.” – Billy Crystal
16. “My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.” – Garry Shandling
17. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.” – Will Ferrell
18. “Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.” – Anonymous
19. “My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.” – Ray Romano
20. “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.” – Rita Rudner
21. “I haven’t dated in a while… I stopped eating.” – Garry Shandling
22. “Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings… and lawyers.” – Richard Pryor

Romantic Funny Quotes for Boyfriends

When it comes to relationships, humor is a great way to express affection while keeping things lighthearted. These quotes blend romance with a touch of playful fun, perfect for sharing with your boyfriend when you want to show love without getting too serious. Whether you’re teasing him or sending a cute, funny text, these romantic yet humorous quotes are sure to bring a smile to his face. After all, laughter is one of the best ways to strengthen your bond in any relationship!

23. “You’re the cheese to my macaroni.” – Juno (Movie)
24. “I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” – Unknown
25. “I’m yours. No refunds.” – Unknown
26. “You’re the reason I look down at my phone and smile. And then walk into a pole.” – Unknown
27. “I love you like how fat kids love cake.” – Scott Adams
28. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber!” – Unknown
29. “You stole my heart, but I’ll let you keep it.” – Unknown
30. “I think you’re suffering from a lack of vitamin me.” – Unknown
31. “Besides chocolate, you’re my favorite.” – Unknown
32. “I love you with all my butt. I would say heart, but my butt is bigger.” – Unknown
33. “Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.” – Unknown

Funny One-Liners About Relationships

Sometimes, all it takes is a quick one-liner to capture the humor in dating and relationships. Whether it’s a witty remark from a sitcom or a clever pop culture reference, these one-liners are short, sweet, and to the point. Perfect for making him laugh, these quips reflect the amusing, sometimes ridiculous aspects of relationships that we can all relate to. From TV shows to stand-up comedy, these funny lines are ideal for sharing when you need to lighten the mood.

34. “Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park.” – Unknown
35. “Relationships are just two people constantly asking each other what they want to eat, until one of them dies.” – Unknown
36. “I love you more than yesterday… yesterday you got on my nerves.” – Unknown
37. “My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.” – Unknown
38. “We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.” – Henny Youngman
39. “I love you, even though you’re always right.” – Unknown
40. “My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married, and I didn’t want him to.” – Rita Rudner
41. “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.” – Unknown
42. “Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Pauline Thomason
43. “I love you no matter what you do… unless it’s something really dumb.” – Unknown
44. “A good relationship is when one person is always right and the other person is the boyfriend.” – Unknown

Funny Quotes From Real People

When it comes to dating, real people often say the funniest things, whether it’s through a witty tweet, a viral meme, or a comment on an online forum. These everyday observations are humorous because they’re so relatable. From the struggles of choosing what to eat to the quirks of daily relationship life, these funny quotes capture the essence of modern love in a way that only real people can.

45. “Dating is just wondering why someone else isn’t texting you back, and then seeing them post on Instagram.” – @GinaMorris (Twitter)
46. “Relationships are just two people constantly asking each other what they want to eat, until one of them dies.” – @tweetsbykiera (Twitter)
47. “My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it’s missing, and what’s there stinks.” – Joan Rivers
48. “My boyfriend said I should stop acting like a detective… so I slipped a note in his pocket that said, ‘I know what you did.’” – Unknown (popular meme)
49. “I told my boyfriend he should embrace his mistakes, so he gave me a hug.” – Unknown
50. “I love you even though you’re always right.” – Unknown (meme)
51. “Being in a relationship is mostly about texting each other ‘What do you want for dinner?’ a thousand times until you both just give up and order pizza.” – @baddestmamajama (Instagram)
52. “I haven’t dated in a while… I stopped eating.” – Garry Shandling
53. “My boyfriend is like a fine wine—he gets better with age. The only problem is, he also gets more expensive.” – Unknown
54. “When your boyfriend gives you his hoodie, it’s not just clothing, it’s a relationship trophy.” – Unknown (Reddit)
55. “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.” – Unknown

Playful and Cute Quotes for Him

Flirting and playful banter are essential for keeping the relationship fresh and fun. These cute and light-hearted quotes are perfect for those moments when you want to show love with a little humor. Whether it’s a sweet joke or a clever pun, these quotes are ideal for making him smile.

56. “Love is sharing your popcorn.” – Charles Schultz
57. “I solemnly swear I am up to no good, especially when I’m with you.” – Unknown (Inspired by Harry Potter)
58. “I love you more than pizza, and that’s saying a lot.” – Mindy Kaling
59. “I’m much more me when I’m with you.” – Unknown
60. “By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates
61. “You’re like a dictionary – you add meaning to my life.” – Unknown
62. “You’re my lobster.” – Phoebe Buffay (Friends)
63. “Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” – George Burns
64. “You had me at ‘We’ll make it work.’” – Unknown
65. “I love you because you join in on my weirdness.” – Unknown
66. “I know I’m a handful, but that’s why you’ve got two hands.” – Unknown

Celebrity Couples’ Funny Quotes

Celebrity couples often provide humorous insights into their relationships, using humor to show that love doesn’t have to be serious all the time. Whether it’s teasing each other on social media or sharing funny anecdotes about married life, couples like Chrissy Teigen and John Legend, and Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds give us a peek into the playful side of their romance. In this section, you’ll find quotes from famous couples who aren’t afraid to laugh at themselves, offering relatable moments of love and laughter.

67. “My wife is so cool. I married up, and don’t forget it.” – John Legend about Chrissy Teigen
68. “I love my husband, but he’s the hardest person to shop for. His taste is so… unique. Last year, I got him a dead bird.” – Chrissy Teigen
69. “My wife is the greatest thing that ever happened to me. And that includes the fact that I’ve been in a few really good superhero movies.” – Ryan Reynolds about Blake Lively
70. “I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.” – Jeff Foxworthy about his wife
71. “I knew I’d get married when I found the girl I could be myself around, but who would still occasionally put on pants.” – Ashton Kutcher about Mila Kunis
72. “I keep hearing the phrase ‘happy wife, happy life.’ I think I’m living that.” – Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson about his wife Lauren Hashian
73. “The best thing about having a partner is having someone who will go get snacks for you, even when you don’t ask.” – Kristen Bell about Dax Shepard
74. “I’d say we’re happily married, but then my wife would correct me.” – Tom Hanks about Rita Wilson
75. “Sometimes I think we’re like a romantic comedy, but I get to live it. Except he never brings me flowers.” – Emily Blunt about John Krasinski
76. “Marriage is finding someone who will annoy you for the rest of your life… but you can’t imagine life without them.” – David Beckham about Victoria Beckham
77. “We’re like Ross and Rachel, except I don’t think anyone’s rooting for us to get back together after a breakup.” – Ryan Reynolds about Blake Lively

Quotes from TV Shows & Movies

TV shows and movies often capture the funny and awkward sides of dating, making us laugh with relatable moments. From awkward first dates to grand romantic gestures, these quotes offer humorous insights into the ups and downs of love. In this section, we’ll dive into iconic dating-related lines from romantic comedies and sitcoms like Friends, How I Met Your Mother, and The Office, making them perfect to share with your partner for a laugh.

78. “I’m hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!” – Chandler Bing, Friends
79. “I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.” – Andy Bernard, The Office
80. “I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” – Chandler Bing, Friends
81. “You’re like a brother to me, except I want to do stuff with you that I wouldn’t do with my brother.” – Rachel Green, Friends
82. “You had me at ‘hello.’” – Dorothy Boyd, Jerry Maguire
83. “I’m in love with you. And I know that love is just a shout into the void and that oblivion is inevitable. But I’m in love with you.” – Augustus Waters, The Fault in Our Stars
84. “I love that you get cold when it’s 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich.” – Harry Burns, When Harry Met Sally
85. “I’m going to do something bold here, I’m going to ask you out.” – Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother
86. “You had me at ‘we’ll make it work.’” – Unknown
87. “I knew it the minute I met you. I just got stuck.” – Pat Solitano, Silver Linings Playbook
88. “I wish I knew how to quit you.” – Jack Twist, Brokeback Mountain

Quotes About First Dates

First dates are a blend of excitement, awkwardness, and the inevitable funny moments that come with trying to make a good impression. From the nerves of picking the perfect restaurant to the hilarious things people blurt out when they’re nervous, these quotes capture all the highs and lows of that first date experience. Whether it’s an awkward pause or a funny misunderstanding, these quotes add humor to the dating process.

88. “I don’t know why people go on first dates. At this point, I’d rather meet someone in a relationship and wait for them to break up.” – Chelsea Handler
89. “First dates are like job interviews with cocktails.” – Unknown
90. “The awkward moment when your date gets up to go to the bathroom and you’re just sitting there, like, ‘What do I do with my hands?'” – Unknown
91. “First dates are for sussing out if we have the same pizza order.” – Unknown
92. “Going on a first date is like an interview, except the company doesn’t hire you at the end.” – Unknown
93. “It’s amazing how we can all act like we have it together when, really, most of us are just hoping we don’t spill our drink on the first date.” – Unknown
94. “A first date is like a math test. You get nervous, overthink, and at the end, you’re still not sure if you got the right answer.” – Unknown
95. “I think the best first date would be at a bookstore. That way if the date sucks, you can at least find a good book.” – Unknown
96. “A good first date is when I don’t have to Google what they’re talking about.” – Unknown
97. “First dates are like playing a game of chess, except neither of us knows the rules and we’re just winging it.” – Unknown
98. “My first date tip? Make sure you have an escape plan… in case you realize they chew with their mouth open.” – Unknown

Cheeky Dating Quotes for Him

Sometimes a little cheekiness can add the perfect spice to a relationship. These flirtatious and slightly naughty quotes are great for when you want to tease him with humor and keep things playful. Whether you’re sending a flirty text or just looking to make him smile with a wink, these quotes will add that extra spark of fun to your connection.

99. “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.” – Unknown
100. “Is it hot in here, or is it just you?” – Unknown
101. “I’m not flirting. I’m just extra friendly to someone who is extra attractive.” – Unknown
102. “You must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all day.” – Unknown
103. “Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.” – Unknown
104. “You’re like a fine wine: you get better with age, and I’m getting tipsy just thinking about you.” – Unknown
105. “Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for.” – Unknown
106. “Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes.” – Unknown
107. “If kisses were snowflakes, I’d send you a blizzard.” – Unknown
108. “Do you believe in love at first sight—or should I walk by again?” – Unknown
109. “You must be made of copper and tellurium because you’re Cu-Te.” – Popular Science Joke

Keep the Laughter Alive in Your Relationship

Humor is one of the best ways to keep the spark alive in any relationship. These funny dating quotes offer a lighthearted way to connect with your partner, whether it’s through playful banter, a cheeky joke, or a heartwarming laugh. Sharing a good laugh can turn any ordinary moment into something special, reminding both of you not to take life—or love—too seriously.

So, the next time you need a quick pick-me-up or want to make your partner smile, come back to this list. These quotes are perfect for adding a dash of humor to your texts, your conversations, or even as little reminders on your social media. Save this collection for whenever you need a good laugh, and feel free to share it with your partner to keep your relationship fun and enjoyable.

Laughter really is the best way to strengthen your bond and make even the most mundane moments memorable. Keep things light, playful, and above all, keep laughing together!